


How to be a Normal Peculiar

by VeryBoredAnon



Category: Miss Peregrine's Home for Peculiar Children - Ransom Riggs
Genre: Post-Library of Souls
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2015-11-21
Updated: 2015-11-21
Packaged: 2018-04-28 01:06:57
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,232
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/5072080
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/VeryBoredAnon/pseuds/VeryBoredAnon
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>With the wights and hollowgasts gone, peculiardom can rest easy. Now that Miss Peregrine and the children can age normally, they can mingle out of the loops with Jacob. There's just one little problem: how were they going to explain this to Mr and Mrs Portman?</p><p>Well, that can be solved (probably). Besides that, Jacob has another duty to the peculiar children, and that would be teaching them about the twenty-first century. Let's hope no one gets addicted to Flappy Bird.</p>
            </blockquote>





	How to be a Normal Peculiar

**How to be a Normal Peculiar**

After teaching the peculiars how to use the stove and getting a few of them to mop up the mud, Jacob instructed for Bronwyn to bring his parents and uncles into the house. There were some difficulties: Jacob's parents were frightened and the uncles were still unconscious. So, carrying the parents in one hand and the uncles in the other, Bronwyn slid through the doorway and brought the adults into the living room while Jacob directed her like a road officer.

"Watch out for his head!" Jacob cried before the mannish girl accidentally hits one of the fat uncles' head against the doorframe.

Bronwyn apologized profusely. "They're just so _big_!"

"It's okay," Jacob said, sighing. "We'll just say he smacked his head and got amnesia."

Finally, Bronwyn dropped all four adults on the sofa. She wound her arms a few times to wring out the ache of carrying such a heavy load.

"They are _much_ heavier than that boulder I threw on that last hollow!" she told Jacob.

Jacob had no idea how heavy was a boulder or the total weight of two overweight men plus a pair of middle-aged adults, but he was sure it wasn't light. Back to his parents, Mr Portman sat still, trembling with fear and confusion while Mrs Portman was curled up in a fetal position, too scared to look up. Jacob felt sorry for them but, at the same time, he also felt like they deserved that for trying to send him to a mental clinic.

"Oh, crap!" Jacob gasped suddenly. "I'm supposed to at this clinic, like, right now! My spot's been paid in advance and it'll suspicious if I don't arrive."

"No problem," Millard said, naked and invisible once again. Jacob felt Millard place a hand on his shoulder reassuringly. "We'll just get Miss P to wipe their memories."

"It was expensive clinic too," Jacob added. He sighed. "There goes the money."

"How much?" Millard asked. "I'll help you get the refund."

"Do you know how to operate a modern cash register?"

Millard doesn't answer.

"I can see the headlines now," Jacob said sarcastically. "'Invisible dude tries to rob mental clinic but has no idea how to use a cash register'. Papers sold: ten thousand!"

"Very funny," Millard said, faking a laugh.

Bronwyn cleared her throat loudly. "Mister Jacob, Mister Millard, I don't think you should be discussing peculiar theft plans before a pair of befuddled normals." She pointed her thumb behind her at Jacon's parents, who seemed to be watching them with their heads down.

" _Who_ is discussing theft plans?" Miss Peregrine asked as she strode into the living room.

"Nope, we're discussing nothing here," Jacob lied.

"What theft plans?" Millard joined in, playing dumb.

After sending Millard off to put on some clothes, Miss Pergrine turned to Jacob. The latter spoke first.

"Is it okay to ask you to wipe the memories of a couple of doctors?" Jacob asked. "You see, I'm supposed to be at this mental clinic two hours from now and it'll be suspicious if I don't."

"A two-hour distance is quite a stretch," Miss Peregrine said. She held her chin thoughtfully. "I could ask one of the ymbrynes to go in my stead. Who are these doctors? What is the address of the clinic?"

"Uh..." Jacob tried to recall the appearances and names of those doctors, but can't. So, he turned to his parents and asked them, "Where was the place again?"

"UF Health Shands Psychiatric Hospital," Mr Portman squeaked. Jacob ran to get a map of Florida to point out the exact location.

"Alright, then," said Miss Peregrine. "I'll just call that house... I think Miss Wren is still there. Jacob, where is your telephone?"

Jacob led the ymbryne to the house-phone, dialed the numbers of the Bentham house, and gave Miss Peregrine the phone. Then, he went to the kitchen and helped the kids cook some omelettes for sandwiches while bread was toasted. Afterwards, the children carried their plates of omelette sandwiches to the living room where the adults still sat there nervously, waiting for Jacob to break the ice between the peculiars and normals.

"So," Jacob began, also a bit nervous, "as I have told you before, these guys (he waved at the peculiar children) are my friends, who I did _not_ make up nor are you hallucinating of (some of the kids snickered behind him). Let me introduce them, or would like to do it yourselves?" he asked the children.

Olive was the first to raise her hand. "Ooh! Ooh!" she said excitedly. "I'll go first! My name is Olive Abroholos Elaphanta! I can fly and I'm lighter than air!"

"You were at the hotel," Mr Portman muttered.

Olive nodded. "Yeah! That was me!"

"I was there too," Millard said, entering the room. In his hand was a plate of omelette sandwich and he was wearing a white undershirt.

Looking at the garbed invisible boy, Jacob asked, "Millard, is that shirt mine?"

"Yes," Millard replied. "You don't mind me borrowing it, do you? It's quite comfortable."

"Sure. Just wash it later."

"You were there too," Mr Portman said faintly, pointing at Millard with a shaky finger.

"I was only wearing bandages then," Millard said. "Millard Nullings, at your service. I think my peculiarity is quite self-explanatory." He took a bite of the sandwich and the portion could be seen chewed up and swallowed. Jacob's parents looked like they were going to faint.

Emma went next. "We have met a few times already, but I will introduce myself once again. My name is Emma Bloom and I can produce fire out of my hands." To demonstrate, she created a few fireballs and started juggling them.

"I am Enoch O'Connor," Enoch introduced himself. From his pocket was a little clay puppet swinging a sewing needle sword. "I can raise the dead. Got anyone you wanna meet again? They'll probably be all bones, though."

"Mister Enoch, you're scaring the normals!" Bronwyn scolded.

"Oh, but you say _nothing_ about Millard?" Enoch said indignantly.

Bronwyn ignored him and introduced herself. "I'm Bronwyn Bruntley. I can lift heavier things than any gold-medal Olympian could."

Meanwhile, Hugh was holding up Claire's hair while Olive fed the sandwich into the girl's back-mouth. Hugh spoke first. As he did so, bees flew in and out.

"I'm Hugh Apiston," he said. "I've got a hive of bees in my belly. I could do with more though."

"And I'm Claire Densmore!" Claire said proudly. "I have a mouth at the back of my head. It's as sharp as a grizzly bear's!"

Finally, it was Horace's turn. "Mr and Mrs Portman," he said grandly, "I am Horace Somunusson. I can predict the future of others--"

"While snoring," Enoch interrupted him. The boy received a slap behind his head by Bronwyn.

"And there you have it," Jacob said like a spokesperson. "My friends, AKA the peculiar children. Are you convinced now?"

There was no reply. The pair of adults were speechless.

"Have we melted their brains?" Olive whispered to Jacob.

"Hopefully not," Jacob replied.

"They'll probably faint like you, I bet," Emma chimed in, whispering too.

As if on cue, Mr and Mrs Portman passed out.

"Like parent, like child," Hugh remarked.

So, Jacob and the others brought his parents to the bed to rest. They'll continue tomorrow.

  **Chapter One *END***


End file.
